incredible kisspulpers

things i learned in 2009

{Its a good an necessary thing to recap the year. I was inspired by other folks who have posted. This one might be a bit cryptic but it helped me realize what a meaningful year it was and where I am, going into this next decade of my life.}

1. When Obama is inaugurated, it will make people believe that all things are possible. Things you had lost hope in will start to seem completely salvageable.

2. Buying a big screen TV will not bring the two of you closer.

3. The mantle should always be clean. Only three books, a vase and a box containing brass knuckles and prayer beads. Do not scream when he places his gym clothes on the mantle. Just remove them. Quietly. Fist Clenched.

4. Buying plane tickets the way you used to buy night stands and drapes will not bring the two of you closer. Do it anyway.

5. Denver will not give you the answers you are seeking. There is no echo in the mountains that will make everything better. Still, hold every Denver mouth like it is sacred.

6. In Detroit, the abandoned buildings cloaked in pink sunset will start to seem like a metaphor for everything. Women’s voices can sing you back to courage.

7. Never connect in Chicago if you can help it.

8. If you do, make sure it is on Sunday. Green Mill will hold you like a lost love.
Choose to say poems with the band. Take the blue line back to the airport and start to breathe in wise/city time.

9. Flying to Columbus, OH for one night is completely worth it. If not for the great show, for the cute boys and the gas station vodka.

10. New York is a tiny Guatemalan restaurant on the corner with good fish and black beans. Laughing with friends. Talking business. Searching for ice cream. The loud, loud.
The sore legs. The colored maps. It’s okay to have no idea where you are and still feel like you are in the center of everything.

11. New Jersey is roasting marshmallows on the deck by the fire. Eating ice cream outside the barn. The gray cold beach. The best burrito ever. Making every pop song more obscene than it already is. Always it’s the good, good people.

12. Making a record is an intimate endeavor. Be as naked as possible.

13. Do not hold Albuquerque responsible for the pain that was endured there. There was the Brazilian brunch, the all day bus ride, the car games, the amazing poeming. Remember those things most. The tears by the bonfire were just kindling.

14. Quit eating while standing up or driving a car.

15. West Palm Beach is not really your scene but damn, the National Poetry Slam is even more of a blast when you are not competing. The geckos are adorable but kind of freaky. Re-confirm that you have the pleasure of knowing some of the most extraordinarily talented and beautiful people in the world.

16. Yes, it’s a good idea to go on tour. Your kids will still remember you. No, you are not a bad mom. Yes, you should have saved more money. It’s okay to be terrified. That’s how you know you’re living.

17. Six weeks on the road will mostly teach you one thing: the Universe never runs out. {See: Things I Learned On Tour notes} Also: the Pacific Northwest is the Kingdom of Ish.

18. Vipassana: Ten days of silence will teach you more about yourself than all of these trips combined.

{It is possible to love someone intensely and permanently. Physical encounters are not necessary for this to happen. You often chose drama over truth.}

19. When you arrive home, you will not know each other. The TV, the mantle, the strange look in his eye will all seem like a bad stage play. You have forgotten all the lines. It’s okay to let it go.

20. Starting a new venue, publishing a book, releasing spoken word CD, the tour, three national competitions and 51 stages will still not make you feel accomplished. It definitely will not help your marriage but it will show you what you are capable of. It will make you fight for what you want in life.

{The people you met this year still hum you to sleep at night. The conversations play over and over. The Human Becomings. That is what you remember most.}

21. Your kids have taught themselves how to ride a bike, tie their shoes and read. You’ve determined that your number one job as a parent is to teach your kids to be self-aware and make conscious choices. Next year, teach yourself how to do the same.

2010 is the year of Sadhana. The work of the Spirit. Get to it.

things we learned while stuck in fresno

1. According to Jim, the Window Washer, we need to get out of the poetry business and into the window washing business. Not a bad idea. We learned all about how to start our own business and which squeegees to buy and how much soap to use.

2. I just learned how to spell squeegee.

3. Fresno used to be desert, until the 1840s, according to a man in the “I’d rather be rafting” hat who pops his teeth out and has a dog named Take Care.

4. Fresno is now 100 by 100. Whatever that means.

5. There is a woman with leopard spot hair and leopard spot tattoos all down her back. Her totem is a kangaroo rat. She knits and is very kind. She hates Fresno.

6. Fresno is divided into very separate areas like cities inside the city. People are really sensitive and protective of their area.

7. This area produces alot of grapes and almonds. Grapes and almonds are Ish Candy.

8. Wakimi dried seeweed makes a decent crunchy snack but only Kait was brave enough to make a soup with gas station water and drink it through a straw.

9. Mustard packets and canned collard greens can seem pretty exiting when your really hungry and have no money.

10. Poeming for strangers who did not ask you to poem for them and when you actually need the money is a very interesting feeling. Even when they enjoy it and even when they give you money. Its good for the brave bones. Good for the humble bones.

11. There’s a man who once wrote a poem called Friends in the 80s. It was about all of his friends who had died of AIDS. He has been studying genealogy since the 21st of June, 1978. He spends 29.95 a month at Ancestry.com.

12. Driving out of Fresno is a sunset over a vineyard and a sigh of relief.

notes i found later

When you called,
I was somewhere outside of Denver,
repacking the car.
My belongings sprawled
out on the pavement.
A tattered purple suitcase.
A bag of accessories. A towel bag.
A saw. A drill. Seriously.

You called to read me a passage
from the Tibetan Book of Living
and Dying, I sat down on the curb
to listen. Then you said, “It’s as if
everything we do, is to prove how
permanent we are.”

“I am so ridiculously permanent,”
I said. “I have all kinds of things to
prove it.”

The mountains chuckled.

The sun cupped my cheek.
It was the first moment all day
that I had noticed the sun. The
light beat down on the industrial
blender, the ironing board, the
bag of canned goods.

We all looked so temporary.

other things we’ve learned

1. Kait doesn’t miss Gypsy {GPS}. We both miss Spike though.
2. Kaleidoscope! Your life is a Kaleidoscope. Shira Erlichman sticks with you. Her CD is a symphonic addiction.
3. After all these years, Ani D still does the body good.
4. Fivel the Volvo should not be taken to Jiffy Lube.
5. Apparently there is a driver axel and that thing can snap out of place.
6. Dark highways and loud trucks make you the praying kind.
7. The tow truck driver will arrive like a savior. Wearing black gloves and tobacco lips.
8. Don’t ask what talk radio show he’s listening to. Don’t ask why he moved from Portland. You want to keep him a hero. 
9. Centralia is in between Portland and Seattle and used to be a lumber town.
10. The newspapers are going out of business and people don’t want to use as much paper so now the tree guys are losing jobs.
11. New paradigms create new industries. But growing pains still hurt.
12. The women in Centralia all look spooky similar. Like they are all related.
13. The packing and re-packing of the car is a bit like life. You realize at various points that you are carrying so many things you don’t really need and there are many things you wish you had but you always seem have exactly what you need.
14. You should apply for your passport when you first know you are going to Canada. You should scrape the money together and make it happen and not listen to people who don’t know what they are talking about. And you shouldn’t trust the internet.
15. You can, however, get your passport very quickly in Seattle. They make it pretty painless and are very courteous. A facebook invite will work as travel itinerary.  Do not leave town until you actually have it in your hands.
16. 3:20 pm can feel like a small death when you arrive after the Passport Agency is closed and you can’t pick up your passport and can’t go to Canada and therefore can not see one of the dopest poetry shows in the continent and will have to go even longer having never, ever, ever left your country. Feel sorry for your self for 45 minutes.
17. Get over it. You are on tour and everything is connected and you can not see the order in things when you are boo-hooing all over the place. Scoop some Idealism off of Kait. Call a good friend, laugh at the Cosmic Karmic Clown together.
18. Watch the sunset in Olympia and remember how small and magical it is to be  human
19. Prepare for ten days of silent meditation. Smile and remember that Buddy told you it will be the most horrible, beautiful thing you will ever do. 
20. Drive, Drive, Drive deeper into your Self.

things we learned in portland

1. When you arrive, delirious and stinky, go to Denny’s. There is a waitress there who moved to Portland from California who doesn’t really like it because people don’t really care what they look like and there are so many gays and lesbians. Feel like you are home.
2. You can get lost in Powell’s, the city of books, and have to page your party even when they are in the same room.
3. They have elementary schools with Edible Schoolyards and Sustainability classes.
4. When you are in a car in Portland, you feel a bit clumsy. When you are walking, you feel like royalty.
5. New Seasons is the best natural foods market ever. You can get full on the samples and they have the most fantastic bulk section complete with grind-your-own nut butters, and agave nectar dispensers.
6. Waffle Windows and Voodoo Doughnuts
7. Arcade bars with beer holders on each game.
8. If you climb to the top of Mt. Tabor at sunset, you can see silhouette of skater kids lined up next to old folks, all glowing in six shades of pink.
9. There is no need to buy anything new in PDX. There are so many incredible resale shops its ridiculous. But if you sell something new in Portland, it better be clever and catchy and offer free-wifi with it. 
10. Oh Stumptown. How I do I love thee and your french kiss in a glass.
11. Block parties and drum circles, back yard fires and canoes hanging from porches.
12. They have sharing down.
13. The Saturday Market is on Sunday too and they have soap truffles and Nepalise food and kids playing violin while their parents sit on the curb and count money. It is utterly strange and delicious.
14. Oregon Microbrews.
15. No sales tax in Oregon.
16. Get 8% happier with each purchase.

things we learned in other parts of washington

1. Bellingham was originally four towns that were merged into one. No one wanted to give up their street names so they have streets that change names quite suddenly.
2. Bellingham {B-ham} is the town of subdued enthusiasm.
3. There is a curse on B-ham known as the China Men’s Curse. When you arrive there you never want to leave.
4. The sunset across the water looks like the old paper mill scattered its love letters all over the sea.
5. The poets in B-ham are ridiculous. Even the crazy ones are profound.
6. There are more people there that don’t use internet than I’ve ever met.
7. Spokane is home to one of the best coffee houses ever. The Empyrean.
8. The Empyrean is in danger of closing and needs to raise money for a sprinkler system. If you would like to help visit:
9. Chrissy and Michelle have a warm, friendly house. We met some lovely anarchists there. 
10. One anarchist pulled out a stack of warrants collected like badges of honor and told us about the time he got a DUI on his bicycle. 
11. Spokane is just as precious the second time. Elephant Engine High Dive  is a worthy excuse to return. {Look out for the Spokane kids at NPS. Dope.}
12. Some poets will never cease to make you cry. They will fold you into a sparrow and turn the rain into your church.
13. There is a man who might still be waiting at the Texaco for me. He thinks we should fight the government together. We both want to change the food system but he thinks Obama is not white enough to be a Nazi and thinks that I want to kill babies. I’m not sure it would work out.
14. The apples and nectarines on Highway 84 are the fruit of Ish. Look for the sign that says “Nectarins”. There is a man there who barely speaks English but is fluent in Generous.
15. The entrance to I-82 in Pasco is closed. You can stop at the Shell and they will give you a slip of paper with the detour directions printed on it. Left Turn and Right Curve will be capitalized. You will have to go through a town called Kennewick to get to the highway. Be careful not to miss the Right Curve or you will have to do it all over again. Though Kennewick is just as awkward and sweet the second time.

things we learned in seattle

1. We might ought to become Jewish, so we can live in the Dojo with Dane.
2. Kids in Seattle are paid to look sad, they are not actually sad, its part of the “Shhh…don’t make people want to move here and ruin our paradise” scheme
3. It doesn’t really rain all the time in Seattle. That is part of the scheme too.
4. If it does rain and you are at the outdoor mall you can pick up a yellow umbrella and leave it there when you are done.
5. They have conveyor belt sushi.
6. There is a place in my dreamland, with very hip furniture and modern architecture and vegan french toast. It has a deck that looks out over the the city with The Kingdom of Ish glistening in the distance. Daemond and Inti live there. They are ambassadors of the Ish.
7. Even in Seattle you can find Ohio State Buckeye fans. O-H-I-O. 
8. If you want to hurry along the keg line at a Seattle keg party, go ahead and hold the kid’s feet so this time he doesn’t shatter the light fixture.
9. Everything is connected. Even the hitchhiker girls you picked up in Ellensburg. Later in downtown Seattle, you see them bumming for change to buy booze. They will invite you to a three-kegger, you will meet a girl there who dates the guy in Bellingham you will meet tomorrow and knows your room-mate from last year and you will start to spin slightly from all the coincidences.
10. The Light Rail is clean and scenic and kinda wonderful.
11. The bus stop is a good place to get directions form a guy with a bloody face who will  ask you for pantyhose and drugs.
12. The view from West Seattle is a hearty dinner.
13. Portage Bay is the only breakfast you will ever crave again. 
14. When you can’t take the city anymore head out to conquer the Kingdom of Ish, Mt. Rainier.
15. Fall asleep to the entire galaxy. Wake up in a cloud.